My husband and I were visiting friends with young teenage children.  We were sitting at the table after a fabulous meal, and I asked the 14-year-old girl what she wanted to be when she grew up.  She said she didn't really know.  I then asked her what she wanted her life to look like.  She and her mom, who was sitting next to her, looked at me like I was crazy.  What?  What does that mean?  I couldn't tell if the mom was giving me the evil eye for suggesting that maybe her daughter didn't need to follow the traditional rules, or if it was a lightbulb going off for both of them that maybe there was a choice to be made and that someone could design a life outside the traditional norm.

Maybe it's unfair to ask a 14-year-old that question.  It's easier when you've got some life experience behind you to know what you like and don't like.  But maybe it's the perfect time to ask, because you also don't have the narrowing of imagination that comes from years of living just like everybody else.

This particular girl is lucky because she's been raised in an untraditional household.  Her parents made some money with a business early on and have been able to live their lives the way they've desired.  They've also instilled in their children the entrepeneurial spirit and modeled the behavior of doing what you love.  Her mother is a pottery artist, and her father runs a small but excellent coffee house in a lovely resort community.  They've designed their lives to be what they wish, and they've had the means to do so.  But they've also made choices along the way to do the things they love and live a sustainable lifestyle. 

Unless we ask ourselves truly, deeply, what we want our lives to look like, many times we squander opportunities in pursuit of a lifestyle that seems attractive but doesn't really fulfill our heart's and soul's desires.  How many of us have bought the big house, the designer clothes, the fancy car -- the upscale lifestyle that we think will really make us happy, only to find that in fact we're more miserable than we ever were because we're tied to those things like anvils around our ankles.  We can't leave a job we don't like or maintain the lifestyle if we're unexpectedly unemployed, and that causes stress to us and our loved ones.  I've never heard anyone answer this question by saying they'd like to commute several hours in traffic, have high-stress meetings all day and come home to a dark house because the family has gone to bed.  Yet that is what many of us do to maintain the trappings of what we've been conditioned to believe is, and what looks from the outside like, an ideal life.

Take a few minutes to sit quietly, breathe deeply, and ask yourself this question:  what do I want my life to look like?  If the answer is something other than the life you are currently living, what could you do today to get closer to what you really want?  It only takes a few steps in the direction of your dreams to get some momentum going.  Make an action plan, and do one thing each day toward the end result.  You'll be amazed how quickly the ball will start rolling, and in no time you'll be living the live you've always imagined!

If you need help clarifying your ideal life, a Creative Career Consultation may be the right next step.  See my website at www.inspiration4success.com for more information, or contact me at kate@inspiration4success.com to make an appointment.  Evening and weekend times available.